I tried to post a blog the other day. It was so incoherent, I have no idea what I was thinking. I even took a (blurry) picture of my ceiling with my phone that I attached to the post. It was bizarro.
In case you hadn’t guessed, I caught a bug. I don’t think it was swine flu unless swine flu makes you feel like you’ve been awake for 3 solid days and your head is in a vice grip cranked by a chain pulled by a Mac truck that just ran you over. In that case, maybe.
And you know what? The “Swine Flu” sounded so much sexier when Edward Cullen had it and it was called Spanish Influenza. Why can’t we have elegant-sounding illnesses like Spanish Influenza? H1N1 sounds like a level in Pac-Man. At any rate, I felt spent just walking to the refrigerator for water. My house never felt so long. When I got to my fridge, I felt like Rambo must’ve felt climbing all those stairs. ‘Cept my fridge is only 2 rooms over. And I wanted to lay down on my wood floor and sleep for a month.
I found out ex post facto that Trouble ate granola bars for every meal on Thursday. Poor kid. He was totally happy about this fend-for-yourself thing and even happier when HandyMan got home and made him Ramen Noodles for dinner. He had four meals consisting only of peanut butter granola bars and Ramen. I’m telling you, Mom gets sick and things are a slippery slope around here.
I felt a lot better over the weekend and managed to enjoy beautiful temps. It was 60+ degrees and amazing. In Iowa we call that enjoy-it-while-you-can-the-next-time-you’ll-feel-warmth-is-6-months-from-now. I still can’t believe there is an entire nation of people who live north of us. I love ya’ Oh Canada, Oh Canada, but y’all are nuts. In the meantime, it’s mid-80s in Florida and I’m taking the boybarians there next month to watch my sister MOBS gradumakate from college. This will be Trouble’s very first time flying. I am worried about recycled airplane air and sick people traveling in December.
The boys have been very healthy in spite of the fact that Trouble was making out with the Wal-Mart cart last week. And after doing a loud and embarrassing Eww Dance in the middle of aisle 14 at the Super Wal-mart, I disinfected him, his mouth, his tongue the cart, his hands, myself. I might have gotten some stray passer-byers. The Ew Dance kinda takes you over. Ironically, at the end of all this, Trouble is perfectly fine, I spent 2 days in bed blogging incoherently and taking photos like this from my phone:
I am so glad we’re all caught up now, aren’t you?
ps – Happy birthday, Nester.
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh, Darcy, I am so sorry you’ve been ill. If I lived closer, I make a mean can of Campbell’s Chicken Noodle!
I really, really get the germaphobia thing. I especially feel that way in WM too. (Just ask my boys!) I also feel paranoid at this time of year with all the viruses and illnesses going around. Use your hand sanitizer, hands away from your face & pray!
That picture is hilarious ~ I’ve had several of those posts that {fortunately} I never posted…but seem so wonderful at the time…
Glad you’re feeling better and coherent!
Jolanthe
Yikes, Darcy – so sorry you were sick! That doesn’t sound like a bit of fun. But I’m with Trouble – I think I could survive on Granola bars and Ramen noodles. Yum.
I’m sorry you’ve been sick. That’s never fun!
Hope you feel better!
All I can say is: thank goodness for HandyMan and Ramen!!!
I’m praying from here on out your recovery is super quick and your winter is mild…. (tho, if that winter thing gets too too bad, you could always make a CA trip after your FL trip!! We usually eat our Thanksgiving Day meal al fresco…)
Only you could make the swine flu funny. Maybe not sexy, but funny runs a close second, right?
I am so glad you are feeling better! Those bugs can be ROUGH!
I can completely related to the EWWWW Dance in the middle of Wal-Mart. Chelsea is 17 years old and I still do that. (Especially now that her little brother is 7 and puts his hands on EVERYTHING….UGH!)
{{{{HUGS}}}}}
Robin
Edward Cullen {drooling} {sigh} I don’t think I got much further….{drooling}
Glad to have you back!
It is great that you could keep it to yourself and not give it to your kids.
We were all sick few weeks back and it was not pretty.
Good luck with Trouble’s first flight.
I hear ya there..
We have to go to India for my dad’s one year death anniversary…some religious event, early next year…in the middle of heavy winters!..i am not looking forward to that…
You poor baby. So glad you’re doing better now.
So Ramen is on the fend-for-yourself menu at your house too, huh? They always say “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Maybe they should revise that a bit. . . “If Mama ain’t functioning, ain’t nobody safe.” Or something like that.
Take care of yourself!
I’m glad you’re on the mend. Love the picture. One of your finest.
And, really, let’s just face it — everything sounds so much sexier when it involves Edward Cullen. Your blog post was even a little sexy — non-swine flu and all — just because you typed his name in it. 
*snort!* This sooo made me laugh out loud!
Oh I hope you’re feeling better. I’m with you Spanish Influenza sounds way more romantic and glam. I have the heebie jeebies now just picturing the make out session with the shopping cart. My kids know I’m a freak about washing hands, keeping hands to themselves, off their face. It’s kind of funny to be me.
HA – great post! Glad you’ve rejoined the living!
I’ve got to agree with Kris ~ the mere mention of Edward’s name triples – nay, quintuples (if it wasn’t a word before, it is now) the sexiness of a post.
Sorry you’ve felt ill though ~ if it was flu-like in nature, it may very well have been the piggyflu. We took the immunizations 2 weeks ago, as we’ve got a kiddo in the ‘high risk’ category ~ I know some people are choosing not to do them, but we decided it was the right way to go for us.
Love the picture ~ the blurriness of the spinning fan is PERFECT for how you described your sickfeelings LOL
I’m chuckling. Not ’cause you’re sick (that sucks and you have my sympathies!) but ’cause I can just SEE you doing your Eww Dance in the middle of “Wally World”. I think doing that dance in Wal-Mart has become a right of passage for all of us mothers…especially the ones with sons.
The whole Walmart scene made me laugh and cringe all at the same time. Who hasn’t been appalled my what their offspring are willing to put their mouth on?
Glad you’re feeling better but sorry you were so sick. At least you know you’re needed~if for no other reason than to provide fresh veggies:)
I totally relate on the term “6monthstilwarmweather”! We live in Germany – and whew winter gets COLD here… My hubby is from Michigan and he agrees with me!
Great job on your
rambo workoutwalking to the fridge – I think you deserve some chocolate now…If you are really worried, stick one of those masks on him to cover his nose and mouth. I’m sure all will be well! I think your sister was awfully kind to graduate in December for ya… sounds like a great excuse to escape the frozen tundra.
I’m glad the boys got some fend-fer-yerself time! I think it is an essential part of growing up– plus, it’s just really fun for them. My boys love to eat cereal and toaster strudels. Would the toaster strudels count as a hot meal?
Crying, just crying over here. Not cuz yer sick and miserable (so sorry! Not to be heartless – I know how it feels to be so miserable that the cool wood floor calls to you!) but because of how many times I’ve had to dance the Ew dance with my “daughter who would put anything.and.I.mean.anything in her mouth” while trying to mentally compute in my head calendar how many days the virus’ she just lapped up will take to grab hold of her and then rage through my 4yo ds’s immune wimpy body before we’re all six of us laying on the hardwood floor!!
Ahhhh, yes…. my favorite season!
I do hope that you feel better soon, before Trouble heads into a sugary granola coma and that your photos return to more clarity!
i’m a little behind in my blog reading these days. so sorry you were sick! Mom is the key element to keeping things going so I can only imagine what it was like! I think I ate granola bar for several meals in a row last week!
“H1N1 sounds like a level in pac-man” hahahahahahhahahaha
Darcy,
You are so funny! I love how you express yourself. And the Wal-Mart story is just soooo true!!!
Glad you are freeling better now.